I hate shoes - I'm man enough to say it. And I detest shoe shopping.
Less than two months ago I bought a new pair of "smart" shoes for work, having worn through both soles of my previous pair of several years.
The new shoes were cut-price. Now I know why - they were designed to fail. And today my feet are wet.
I am now experiencing Starship Enterprise-style separation events between both of the heels and the "foot-vessels". The toecaps are irretrievably scuffed so much that they now resemble white plimpsoles. The rubber in the soles is all chipped away at the sides. And both laces have shed their skin, each of the lace's outer casing threading away to leave just the untieable skeletal wires remaining.
The make of the shoes is Coxx - exactly what I feel like for having brought them in the first place.
I reckon that bare-foot-runner Zola Budd had the right idea. I'm going to start toughening my feet up with vinegar and glue, maybe leaving them in the airing cupboard overnight, so that I never have to worry about being shoe-clad again. That'll teach the evil shoe corporations...