Wedding update - snow and inadvisable poems
As this hectic working week draws to a close I must take stock of what was my undoubted highlight. Early Wednesday morning we set off through the blizzard in my trusty motor, our heroic mission to visit the Superintendent Registrar to confirm a few key details which will ensure that our imminent nuptials are legally binding.
And what an adventure it was, albeit one not actually very adventurous as such. The snow always gets me in an excitable mood anyway, it bringing with it decades of memories. Childhood winters and Christmastime. The excitement of skiing holidays. Happy memories from a few years back - long before myself and my bride-to-be had even dared ask each other out - when at the end of a night's clubbing in town with friends we left the club to unexpectedly enter a snowscape, and, as my girlfriend says, "she enjoyed it when I was hassling her with snowballs as I was paying her lots of extra attention". And then, 13 months ago, the day that I asked her to marry me, in a similar snowscape and the very same town. But I digress.
One of the things that we had to prepare beforehand "for vetting" this week were the readings for our ceremony. We'd sourced a fair selection of material beforehand, and had tested our shortlist on each other. Public speaking isn't something that I do alot of nowadays, but after this evening of readings I've decided that its an actor's life for me. Great fun.
We did find some good pieces in amongst the dross, but they shall remain under wraps. Instead I want to share with you a couple of the readings in the literature that we'd been sent by the Registrar.
Read this, if you will, and try to imagine how one could possibly have these orated at a wedding service without mirth breaking out. It would start off as just a few sly looks amongst guests, quickly evolving into smiles and murmurs, through to chuckles and shoegazing, before exploding into full-on howls of laughter...
"Us Two" (first and last verses)
Wherever I am, there's always Pooh, There's always Pooh and Me. "Where are you going today?" says Pooh: "Well that's very odd 'cos I was too. >"Let's go together," says Pooh, says he. "Let's go together," says Pooh.
So wherever I am, there's always Pooh, There's always Pooh and Me. "What would I do?" I said to Pooh, "If it wasn't for you," and Pooh said: "True. "It isn't much fun for One, but Two "Can stick together," says Pooh, says he. "That's how it is," says Pooh.
"The Owl and the Pussy-Cat"
The Owl and the Pussy-Cat went to sea In a beautiful pea-green boat, They took some honey, and plenty of money, Wrapped up in a five pound-note. The Owl looked up to the stars above, And sang to a small guitar, 'O lovely Pussy! O Pussy, my love, What a beautiful Pussy you are, You are, You are! What a beautiful Pussy you are.'
Pussy said to the Owl, 'You elegant fowl, How charmingly sweet you sing. O let us be married, too long have we tarried, But what shall we do for a ring?' They sailed away for a year and a day, To the land where the Bong-tree grows, And there in the wood a Piggy-wig stood, With a ring in the end of his nose, His nose, His nose! With a ring in the end of his nose.
'Dear Pig, are you willing, to sell for one shilling Your ring?' Said the Piggy, 'I will.' So they took it away, and were married next day, By the Turkey who lives on the hill. They dined on mince, and slices of quince, Which they ate with a runcible spoon; And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand, They danced by the light of the moon, The moon, The moon! They danced by the light of the moon.