I think I'm being stalked by the crew of the USS Enterprise...
Yesterday whilst enjoying my lunch by the lake at work I heard the distinct sound of a Star Trek communicator. No sign of any ageing space travellers, so I figured it might've been someone out of view with a fancy mobile ringtone, perhaps beyond that grass mound behind where I was sat.
But then, today, I heard that distinct bird-like sound again, and the theoretical probability of it actually being Kirk and co is increasing.
I have one of those palmtop diaries, which, at the click of a button, transforms its' screen into that of a tri-corder. Where we ever to pass in the street, I could transmit the software to you by infra-red....